I ask that a lot, about many of the women I encounter – both online and in real life. Sometimes, I am happy for them and their accomplishments. Other times, I can get a bit down. Envious. Sad. Even resentful. Bitter.
(Note: photo has nothing to do with post content; just pretty filler.)
And then people ask it of me. Especially after they’ve read this blog or seen something else I’ve made or done.
“How do you do it all?”
Short answer: I don’t.
Beauty of a blog is I get to pick what’s in it. So I talk about the good stuff and don’t openly share the bad. But it’s there. Oh, it certainly is! My weaknesses. Failures. Mistakes. Shortcomings.
You don’t believe me?
Well, I could start listing stuff, but it’s a depressing list... Just imagine your worst day and think about how you felt. I feel that same exact way on a regular basis.
Recently, I’ve been changing the question.
“She seems to be doing what is most important to her and what she is good at. How can I do the same?”
And that’s one reason I haven’t posted since August. Other things have pushed blogging, and even “making stuff,” way down on the list. But I do miss it. So will try something new:
- Make stuff when I can, but not if it requires:
- overusing a mindless activity that keeps my children out of my hair,
- conveniently forgetting that we need to eat every day,
- wading through household debris on the way to my sewing machine,
- in general, abdicating my various responsibilities.
- Limit blogging (writing, uploading photos, fiddling with blog design, etc) to 15-minutes a day.
I’m way over that time limit for today. Oops. So to end, how about another random photo?
Fun new blog background! Like you, I'm convinced that "she" doesn't do it all. It's all a matter of vantage point!
ReplyDeleteAlthough you couldn't have known it, this post is so timely for me this morning. I've spent the last few days fuelling my depression with a deep sense of jealousy and inadequacy, all rolled into one poisonous ball. What you've said really rings true, that no one does it all, all the time, and that priorities have to be set. Thank you for such perfect timing!
ReplyDeleteAs someone who loves to see what you've made, I hope things fall into place for you soon :)
What, Dee? You're going by Elizabeth now?!? : ) Hee hee, I changed the header now too; much more autumnal now! And I do so love your comments.
ReplyDeleteLaura, your note was lovely! Thanks for leaving it. And oh yes, I feel my crafting mojo coming back. Woo hoo!
thanks for writing this. i went through the same sort of crisis this past summer and went for a month and a half of abandoning all blog-related activities. everything you wrote here rings very true for me too. i see so many other bloggers who do so many amazing things on a regular basis, despite having kids and jobs or whatever else, and i can't comprehend how it's possible. and like laura said above, i feel completely inadequate. but every so often, someone says the same of me, and it makes me think. obviously i don't write about what a hideous mess our apartment is always in or how often it's late for dinner and i still haven't even a clue as to what to cook. so i stopped doing anything at all online and concentrated only on the "practical things." but after a while, i couldn't resist the call of blogger and sharing my things with the few people who listen! i guess we all just need to remember that nobody out in the blogosphere gets it all done, despite appearances. we just do what we can. hang in there! :) lisa
ReplyDeleteWell Gals, after reading all your comments, all I can say is don't worry too much about it: I think it is part of our DNA. AND, children have selective memories--K is proof of THAT! (Just re-read the tribute she made for her mother!) One of the mottoes in a group I attend is "Look for the good."
ReplyDeleteK, if your globe was turned just a teeny-tiny bit to the right and maybe up, you could see where I am--Capetown, S.Africa. At dinner we were speaking of a man who grew up in Cabrini Green (Chicago public housing of the 60-70s) and felt very "po" compared to others ...until he came to South Africa, one of the more economically advantaged countries of this continent, and exclaimed with disbelief, "I had NO IDEA what poor was!"
I hope I never forget his words, nor the memory of children I saw leaping for joy at the side of the road after giving them a bit of left-over bread, peanut butter and jam. 'Desiderata' has the line: "do not compare yourself with others for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself."
Don't let your joy be stolen away by comparing! (btw: I MUST lecture sometimes--it is part of a mother's DNA!)
That's right, Lisa, we'll do what we can. Good thing to keep in mind. And by the way, I love your profile icon!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your note, Ma. You're a wise woman. : )
thanks! a friend made it for me in exchange for some translation work.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I love conveniently forgetting that we need to eat, but it has very negative consequences...
ReplyDeleteHa ha, MaryAnne. I'm especially laughing because it's 5:06pm and I have no idea what we'll eat for dinner tonight. But we did all just have a bunch of chocolate, so that should tide us over for a while. : )
ReplyDeletewell said ms karin! do we live parallel lives?
ReplyDeletethe best was, "wading through household debris on the way to my sewing machine". hilarious, yet so true.
i've been back at blogging bc it's fun! even though no one comments, i know people are reading, and if it helps one person, i'm a happy camper, plus it keeps me motivated to keep up with projects. ah, the endless list of projects...
thanks for your honesty!!!
Yay! Glad you're back. I even came by the blog a few weeks ago to make sure I hadn't accidentally unsubscribed somehow.
ReplyDeleteYour words ring so very, very true to me as well. Thanks for your honesty: your realness is one of the things I like most about reading your blog.
PS - love the random pictures; that totally cracked me up :)
SKL, thanks for stopping by. And I don't know what's up with no one commenting at your place - I LOVE it! The only thing keeping me from commenting on every single post recently while I was catching up was not wanting to appear stalker-like. : )
ReplyDeleteSara, we should get coffee sometime. From your comments here and your blog over there, you seem like a great gal to know. Maybe between errands this Thursday I could stop by -- you're in Texas right? Well, shoot, there goes that idea...